When did this sound like a good idea?

Here's a few news stories that struck me as entertaining in the past week.

HEAVE TO AND PREPARE TO BE BOARDED ARGH!!
PARIS - Somali pirates in two skiffs fired on a French navy vessel early Wednesday after apparently mistaking it for a commercial boat, the French military said. The French ship gave chase and captured five suspected pirates. No one was wounded by the volleys from the Kalashnikov rifles directed at La Somme, a 3,800-ton refueling ship, French military spokesman Rear Adm. Christophe Prazuck said
La Somme "was probably taken for a commercial ship by the two small skiffs" about 250 nautical miles off Somalia's coast, Prazuck said.
"They understood their mistake too late," he said.
One skiff fled, and La Somme pursued the second one in an hour-long chase. "There were five suspected pirates on board. No arms, no water, no food," Prazuck said.
This is the second time in the last year Somali pirates have attacked a French Navy ship, I'll bet none of the pirates know how to swim either.

Is that a hanging chad or are you just decomposing?
MOBILE, Ala. - Reynolds Smith Jr. was a stalwart Democratic voter. But the Alabama Democratic Party overlooked another fact when it appointed Smith to an interim party panel: He died in November at age 83.

Party executive director Jim Spearman told the Press-Register on Tuesday that the mistake was caused by outdated records. He said the party received Smith's name from a 2006 list of candidates for the Mobile County committee and then used a voter list to verify him as an active voter.
Wow, I'll bet ACORN had something to do with this!!

DIE YOU GUPPY BASTARD!!!
PORTLAND, Ore. - A Portland man who attacked his ex-girlfriend and impaled her pet fish this summer has been sentenced to two years probation, a psychological evaluation and community service.

Donald Earl Fite III, 27, pleaded guilty Tuesday to animal abuse and domestic violence assault.
According to court records, Sarah Harris had broken up with Fite but returned to her Portland apartment July 25 to find him lying on her bed, saying he wanted to get back together. When Harris tried to leave, Fite shoved her against a wall, grabbed her hair and tossed her against a bathtub.Harris fled but returned with an officer to find her fish — a bright purple betta named "DeLorean" — on the wood floor with a knife through it. Nothing says love like skewering your beloved's fish to the floor.

Now go have a nice day :)